Delicious Distraction
by Weissangel24
Summary: The banged pilot's inner turmoil caused by a certain blonde.


**Delicious Distraction**

**by **

**Weissangel24**

**03/17/05**

**Warnings: This fic contains mild language, light Ooc and Shounen-ai.**

**If such things bother you either don't read it**

**or keep your comments to yourself.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters.**

**This fic was written for the enjoyment of crazed fans such as myself.**

**I'm not getting rich off of this**

**So please don't sue me.**

**I just recently was fired from one of my jobs. T-T**

**I'm completely BROKE!**

**Comments and Criticisms are welcomed,**

**but please don't be nasty about them.**

**I am the self-nominated Queen of Sap**

**-**

**Timeline: AU During the series**

**Arigato**

**-**

**Weissangel24**

**A/N Of course this hasn't been beta'd yet.**

**You know me, you know the drill.**

**You see any mistakes let me know & I'll fix them.**

**Arigato**

XxXxX 

**Delicious Distraction**

**XxXxX**

**Demons. **

**Those memories and spirits of the past that haunt your waking step **

**and viciously tear apart your dreamless sleep.**

**Everyone has them, I suppose, though some are worse than others.**

**I've taken great care in hiding my demons. **

**Of burying them away. **

**I can't afford to have someone hurt by them... **

**Of having _him_ hurt by them.**

**I sigh, as I turn back to my repairs. **

**Heavyarms had sustained system damage during my last mission. Apparently it was the work of a computer virus, though I had no idea as to how it had infected my system. 'Damn,' I mentally curse. I'm really no good with computers. Hiiro should be doing this instead of me. I'm more likely to fry the system permanently.**

**ERROR: FAILURE TO DOWNLOAD**

**'Damn it.' I swear again. I'll have to go back into the house and see if Hiiro is there. 'Maybe he can purge the system...'**

**I climb down from the cockpit and head back towards the safe house. As I near, I can make out a small blonde boy, sitting in the windowsill of the bedroom we shared. Inwardly, I groaned. I was not in the mood to deal with Quatre today.**

**I couldn't afford the distraction... as pleasant as it was.**

**He was at the foot of the stairs when I entered the house. "Hiiro's not here." He told me. "He had a mission."**

**'Wing is still in the hanger.' I frowned to myself.**

**"He didn't need Wing." He shrugged, idly tracing the carved design on the banister with slender, pale fingers. "Could I help you?"**

**I stared at him for a moment. **

**A long moment. **

**So long, that most people would have become uncomfortable by the attention... Though, Quatre is hardly most people...**

**He stared right back.**

**"Hiiro showed me how to restart Sandrock's system when it was infected by a virus. I bet Heavyarms is the same way..." He looked uncertain for a moment. "That is the problem... isn't it? Why you're so frustrated?"**

**I glared at him. Sometimes, I hate that _Space heart_ of his. It allowed him to go where no one had any business of going. Of seeing things that I didn't even want to see...**

**"If you don't want my help, you could at least verbalize it." He pouted slightly, "It wouldn't kill you to talk to me."**

**'_God_, he looked _adorable_ when he does that... I just want to-He's a distraction...' My soldier's mind refused, 'I have a mission tomorrow and I need to fix my Gundam...Even if he were a help, he'd still be a _distraction_. I can't have that... Besides...' I added sadly, '... he couldn't possibly feel anything towards me..."**

**"Trowa?"**

**Ignoring him, I turned and left the way I came. I had to get my Gundam fixed. Suddenly, he was in front of me, blocking my way. I glared at him, silently demanding that he get out of my way.**

**"Tell me?" He asked, his azure eyes glistening with emotions that I couldn't possibly understand.**

**"Tell you what?" I asked bluntly. His eyes lit up at hearing my voice before they took on a saddened expression, as he sighed. Mentally, I kicked myself for being the cause of that look.**

**"What's in your heart, Trowa... I want you to tell me."**

**"I don't have a heart, Quatre." I shrugged, "Therefore, I can't tell you anything."**

**"That's not true!" The smaller boy yelled at me, his eyes a storm of frustration. "That's not true, and you know it!" He place a delicate hand over his heart, "I know it's not true..."**

**"Quatre, you don't know anything about me." I bit back harshly. Harsher than I had intended.**

**"I know you hurt." Came the quiet response. "I know that you have fears."**

**"Everyone hurts, Quatre. Everyone fears."**

**"But I can't help everyone..." The blonde whispered, "I don't want to help everyone..."**

**"It would be a better use of your time." I shrugged, moving to push by him.**

**"Do you hate me?" Quatre said in a voice so hushed that I nearly didn't catch the words.**

**"What?" I halted, turning to look at him.**

**"Do you hate me?" The words were louder, though he still had his back towards me.**

**Pain ripped through my chest, "Why do you ask?" I countered.**

**"You keep pushing me away."**

**"If you haven't noticed, I push everyone away." I swallowed hard.**

**"It hurts, Trowa..." He sniffled.**

**Great, now I've made him cry. I mentally kicked myself again. I have to be the most insensitive jerk I know... next to Hiiro... and maybe Wu Fei... I don't want him to be upset. I don't want him to cry- 'Distraction!' The soldier in me interrupted, 'Don't get distracted!'**

**I really hate myself sometimes...**

**Most times.**

**But still... Why should I pushing everyone away, hurt Quatre? I'll be frank, I didn't understand. My closest guess would be his space heart but somehow, I don't think that was quite it...**

**His pale fingers brushed back my bangs, as I suddenly found him very near to me. 'Damn it, I got distracted and let my guard down!'**

**He stared up at me with those liquid eyes that could hold only truth. He was searching. Searching my eyes, my heart and my soul. **

**And I couldn't hide.**

**"Quatre?"**

**A small smile tugged at his lips, even as he bowed his forehead against my chest to hide his tears. "I'm sorry..." He whispered. "I didn't realize that I bothered you so much... You should have told me. I would have left you alone..."**

**"Quatre..." My heart felt like it was breaking under the weight of sorrow in his tone. Even as my soldier side rebelled, I stood there, allowing him to cry into my shirt.**

**"I realize that I'm a bit too emotional for a soldier." He was saying, "I realize that my space heart intrudes. I realize that I can be annoying. I realize that I'm..." His voice trailed off as he choked on a sob. "... in the way... And I realize... that I have no business loving you... especially during war... but I do, Trowa... I do..."**

**I'm sure that my eyes were as wide as saucers. I was sure my mind was playing tricks on me. There is no way that he could have said what I think he just said...but he did... didn't he... And he's crying... because I've hurt him... because I don't let him in... 'Damn it, I really do deserve the Dumb-ass Of The Year award.'**

**"That's not true, Quatre." I whispered, wrapping my arms around his shaking shoulders, pointedly ignoring the inner-soldier that screamed to be heard and obeyed. "You're never in the way... a distraction, at times... but not a bad one..."**

**"I don't understand." He whispered, looking up at me, his eyes acting as a portal into his soul. His love, his kindness, his courage, his fear, the storm of emotions that made him Quatre. Made him the person that I desired... was mine to witness. "Tell me?" He whispered.**

**"Tell you what?" I shook my head, tilting his chin up so that I could see his face. "What's in a heart that doesn't exist? What keeps me awake at night? What I find... distracting?"**

**"_Yes!_" He exclaimed, his eyes pleading with me. "I _want_ to know, Trowa! Everything about you! What makes you, you!" he looked away again, "You hide so much..."**

**"I don't... want... to hurt you." I said cautiously. "You won't like what you see."**

**"Everyone has their own demons, Trowa." He said, "Allah, knows I have my own..."**

**For the second time in fifteen minutes, I was startled. It never had occurred to me that Quatre had his own haunting ghouls... **

**He always seemed... above it... protected from it. **

**Suddenly, I was filled with an indescribable desire to protect the smaller boy whom I still held in my arms. Protect him from danger, shelter him from his fears and comfort his pain.**

**"Don't say I didn't warn you." I whispered into his ear, before tilting his chin up and placing a fleeting kiss on his lips.**

**He blinked up at me, startled and slightly unsure as to what I had just done; before a smile lit up his face and he kissed me back... with much more enthusiasm than I had shown.**

**"Thank you..." He whispered, when we had finally pulled away from each other.**

**"For what?" I asked.**

**"For being you."**

**I allowed a small smile to tug at my lips, "Do you still want to help me with Heavyarms?"**

**"Of course." Quatre nodded.**

**"Maybe after we're done... you can... help me open up more?" He blushed rather cutely as I took his hand in mine and we walked the rest of the way to the hanger.**

**XxXxX**

**Owari**


End file.
